Palawan:
The scenery in Palawan will most definitely blow your mind. The region is comprised of a stunning cluster of beautiful islands surrounding the massive main island of Palawan, and the small, vibrant town of El Nido is where Barbie and I officially based ourselves.
El Nido is completely surrounded by dramatic bays, white-sand beaches, hidden lagoons, towering limestone cliffs, and thick tropical jungle. The whole landscape gives off a distinct, raw look that makes you feel like you just stepped directly onto a Jurassic Park movie set. It looks like absolute paradise.
While Boracay Island possessed a highly commercialized, touristy holiday feel, El Nido provided us with significantly more authentic interaction with the local population.
I particularly enjoyed watching the local kids out here. They grow up on a totally different frequency than kids raised in sterile, hectic cities. They seem to possess a much richer sense of nature, calm, and contentment. I suppose that’s the byproduct of living such a wonderful, active, outdoor lifestyle.
The Filipino locals may not have a great deal of money by Western standards, but they are clearly blessed with a happy, fun-loving life and a unique, tight-knit camaraderie. I’m not sure if Barbie and I just happened to hit the island during a special time of the year, but every single night of our stay featured some sort of vibrant party or street festival. The Filipinos genuinely love getting together out in the open streets, hanging out, playing music, and just having fun.
Island Hopping
Palawan is universally known as one of the more expensive islands in the Philippines, and the best way to experience it is to hop onto a small wooden outrigger boat and explore. The ultimate daily activity here is booking island-hopping tours to scout out remote beaches and hidden lagoons that are completely inaccessible by land.
However, one of the real bummers of our time in El Nido was the influx of jellyfish in the ocean waters. We happened to arrive right during a solar eclipse, and Barbie informed me that these eclipses and full moons actively bring out the jellyfish. Now, I always knew full moons brought out wasted, raving backpackers, but I had absolutely no idea the lunar cycle also mobilized these slippery little jellyfish who like to sting.
I can deal with a lot of crazy shit on the road, but one thing that gives me the absolute creeps is jellyfish. They did a good job of scaring me right out of the water, preventing me from swimming in parts of the unbelievably crystal-clear sea. Consequently, I didn’t get to see every single beautiful island and beach on my hit list. Palawan is just one of those magical places that I cannot properly describe with words; you’ve really just got to see it for yourself.
Getting to El Nido
Getting to this little slice of paradise can be a serious pain in the butt—quite literally. Most travelers fly into Puerto Princesa and are then forced to endure a brutal, ass-destroying, six-hour van ride up potholed roads to reach El Nido.
[THE EL NIDO TRANSPORT DILEMMA]
┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Option A: Fly to Puerto Princesa + 6-Hour Brutal Van Ride │
│ Option B: The Flashpacker Route ────> Fly Direct to El Nido │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
Unless you specifically want to visit Puerto Princesa to check out the nearby UNESCO-listed Underground River and caves, the much better option—albeit a bit more expensive—is to fly direct. Only one boutique carrier, AirSWIFT, flies this nonstop route into El Nido’s tiny airstrip.
It felt like flying on a private jet. I was incredibly impressed with their service, and it easily ranks as the best flight of our entire trip so far. In the past, this airline was exclusively locked down for elite guests staying at the ultra-high-end El Nido Resorts properties. Fortunately, they opened up seat bookings to non-guests, and we pulled the trigger on the direct tickets. It was a great decision and worth every extra dollar.
El Nido town itself is a beautifully relaxed place in a surreal tropical setting. The town is primarily geared toward a younger, high-energy backpacker and flashpacker crowd, mostly aged 20 to 40. That didn’t deter us old farts for a second; we thoroughly enjoyed the vibrant energy of the younger crowd. The town doesn’t have a heavily built-up infrastructure to cater to the pampered comfort levels of the luxury-holiday traveler, which is exactly why you don’t see an older demographic walking around.
While there are a few ultra-luxury resorts tucked away on isolated private islands nearby, Barbie and I never visited them. Honestly, I have a feeling that staying at those highly sanitized, exclusive resort enclaves completely isolates you from fellow travelers, the local culture, and the real vibe of El Nido.
🍽️ The El Nido Culinary Rotation
We ate at a mix of local and international spots right in the heart of town:
- Altrove: Best wood-fired pizza on the island. Always a line, but worth the wait.
- The Art Cafe & Mezzanine: Solid Western comfort food, fresh local seafood, and meeting fellow travelers.
- Jarace Seafood: Right on the beach—you pick your fresh catch and they grill it over open charcoal on the sand.
- V & V Bagels & JBR: Great breakfast stops to fuel up before a long day on an outrigger boat.
LOOSE STOOLS INDEX
- Rating: 7 / 10
The digestive tract is slowly but surely adjusting to a brand-new country. Big Doug is officially on the mend, firmly on the path toward solid, structurally sound stools, and fully ready to kick some serious ass.
Thru the Binocs
Fresh young coconuts are readily available on every single corner out here. It is right here in Southeast Asia that I am fully discovering the absolute magic this fruit possesses, and I am slowly becoming a certified coconut guru.
Think about it: Abe Froman is the Sausage King of Chicago, Barney Greengrass is the Sturgeon King, Michael Jackson was the King of Pop… so why can’t Big Doug be the Coconut King? It’s a title I am proudly claiming.
Coconut water is currently a massively hip, high-priced drink worldwide because of its endless health benefits. But take note: this elite water does not come from those hard, hairy brown coconuts you see in Western grocery stores. True coconut water comes exclusively from the young green coconuts that are incredibly prevalent and dirt cheap across Southeast Asia. These coconuts have smooth green husks and soft, jelly-like white meat inside.
I am completely intrigued by the coconut, and it is my royal duty as King to pass down some serious knowledge to you:
- Ultra-Hydration: The water inside a young green coconut is great for hydration in the oppressive Southeast Asian heat.
- Potassium Bomb: One single coconut contains significantly more potassium than several bananas combined.
- Bug Defense: The water contains natural Vitamin B, which mosquitoes don’t like. I constantly see the savvy locals applying homemade coconut oil mixed with lemongrass or eucalyptus as a natural repellent.
- Natural Sunscreen: Pure coconut oil possesses a natural SPF 10 rating, is 100% chemical-free, and is a natural suntan lotion.
- Salty Hair Care: Since my hair is growing longer on the road, I’ve been using coconut oil as a leave-in conditioner. Barbie says it keeps my hair hydrated against the brutal saltwater and tropical sun.
I even read the following interesting note on the internet:
“During WWII, field hospitals actually used fresh coconut water for emergency intravenous blood transfusions because it possesses the exact same chemical makeup as human blood plasma. It naturally flushes toxins, boosts electrolytes, aids digestion, elevates your mood, and fights off viral and bacterial infections.”
I am incredibly bullish on the green coconut. Long live the King!
Big Doug & Barbie Drop Out of Society 