Sydney (Australia)

Sydney:

Following our relaxed tropical beach retreat in the Society Islands of French Polynesia, Barbie and I were feeling completely refreshed and re-energized. We decided it was time to head back to the glorious wackiness of Asia to check out a few countries we missed during last year’s eight-month swing through Southeast Asia.

But we had a tactical trick up our sleeve. The Cathay Pacific ticket we purchased permitted a one-week pit stop in Sydney, Australia. A hip urban metropolis, fabulous ocean beaches, and one final opportunity to scoff down a few more meat pies and fish ‘n’ chips? We simply could not pass up that travel superfecta.

Serenity, Sunsets, and Political Realities

Sydney Harbour is easily one of the most picturesque waterways in the entire world. Circular Quay and the surrounding waterfront promenade serve as the city’s main hub of activity. You’ve got the historic Rocks district, the iconic Opera House, and my personal favorite city park, the Royal Botanic Garden, all sitting in close proximity to each other.

The Royal Botanic Garden is a true oasis right in the middle of the urban center. Its sprawling green lawns are a killer place to cool out, relax, and watch the fast pace of the city grind to a screeching halt. One afternoon, surrounded by all that pure serenity, I found myself reflecting on the good in this world. Then, for some strange reason, my mind completely drifted to a darker place: how is it humanly possible for the person currently running the United States—the country I was born in—to be such an absolute, all-around asshole?

Note to self: When a park is this nice, do not let politicians ruin the vibe.

Once I cleared my head, we focused back on the harbor.  Circular Quay is the departure point for the fleet of ferries that shuttle you through the harbor to Sydney’s smaller coastal pockets and their amazing beaches.  Sydney boasts over 200 beaches, each offering its own unique spin.  With at least nine warm months out of the year (October to May) and easy accessibility via public transit, the beach is a massive lifestyle draw here.

Battle of the Beaches: Manly vs. Bondi

We hopped the ferry over to Manly Beach, a cool little surf town, and it instantly became one of our favorite spots to spend the day.

[Manly Beach] ──> Quaint, relaxed, old-school coastal town vibe (Big Doug's pick)
[Bondi Beach] ──> Younger, high-energy, vibrant surfer scene (Barbie's pick)

If you talk to the locals, they’ll tell you that Bondi Beach is soy número uno and completely blows Manly out of the water.  In my opinion, Manly and its quaint, relaxed town had the definitive edge. Flashpacking Barbie, however, preferred the younger, more vibrant surfer energy over at Bondi.

The big Bondi draw is the famed six-kilometer Bondi to Coogee coastal walk.  It is easily the most talked-about trail in the city, and it’s a non-negotiable must-do.  The path hugs the massive sandstone cliffs, serving up ridiculous views of the ocean while passing through five of the finest urban beaches on the planet: Coogee, Clovelly, Bronte, Tamarama, and Bondi.

While wandering around downtown Sydney afterward, we both had moments where we wondered if we were actually in Australia or somewhere in Asia.  There is a massive Asian population here, and every other storefront downtown is a restaurant serving some variety of Asian cuisine.  This “Asian invasion” is incredibly apparent and looks very similar to what we witnessed over in Auckland, New Zealand.  The only difference?  Auckland felt like a younger crowd of university students, whereas Sydney seems to have an older, established, working-class Asian community. Interestingly, I didn’t notice these massive swaths of populations during our time in Melbourne.

Bondi Beach

Sydney vs. Melbourne: Let’s Get Ready to Rumble

Both Melbourne and Sydney frequently pop up on those annual global lists touting the “world’s most livable cities.”  Having just wrapped up a three-month stint in Oz that included Melbourne, we were primed to see how Sydney stacked up.

Throughout our travels in Australia and New Zealand, we constantly met locals from both spots and quickly discovered an intense, fierce rivalry between the two.  If you live in either city, debating which one is superior is virtually the biggest conversation starter around—second only to arguing over who has the tastiest fish ‘n’ chips.

The rivalry isn’t quite on the scale of the Crips vs. the Bloods, but the meat-pie-eating “mates” from both sides are aggressively demanding respect.  This clash of titans clearly needed to be settled, and us flashpackers arrived in town to act as the ultimate judges.

The Tale of the Tape

• Vibe & Weather: Sydney is faster paced, louder, and crawling with trendy hipsters. Melbourne has a much more laid-back, bohemian, hippie vibe. Sydney feels slick and modern, whereas Melbourne leans into an older, vintage look. Sydney also takes the crown for weather. Melbourne’s weather is completely schizophrenic and unpredictable. While we were there, we literally experienced three seasons in a single afternoon. As the local saying goes: “If you don’t like the weather in Melbourne, just wait five minutes for it to change.”

• The Food Scene: Australia is a massive multicultural society, and both cities are true melting pots. In Asia, every other storefront is a massage parlor; in Australia, every other storefront is a place to chow down. Sydney and Melbourne are packed with casual, “quick-serve” joints catering to foodies and yuppies on the move. Don’t confuse these with American fast-food chains—this isn’t the low-grade dog food you get in the States. These are high-quality, reasonably priced international spots.

• The Cuisine Showdown: Sydney’s casual food scene is heavily dominated by Asian cuisines (Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Taiwanese, Malaysian, Thai, Indonesian—you name it). It’s great if you have a craving for it, but it feels a bit limited compared to Melbourne’s diverse, Euro-centric culinary options. Oh, and if you want a true novelty, the Australian Heritage Hotel in Sydney serves a “Coat of Arms” pizza topped with actual kangaroo and emu meat. Australia has got to be the only country on earth that actively eats its own national animals!

• Culture & Transit: Melbourne takes the prize for artsy reputation and pure culture. The cafe culture there is incredibly strong—everyone just sits around shooting the shit while sipping  lattes and eating kick-ass brunches. The live independent music scene is everywhere, and the street art is world-class. Walking down Melbourne’s alleyways to check out the massive painted murals on the sides of buildings was wild. (I always wondered: how do these artists get permission to paint a building, and what stops another guy from just rocking up and painting over it?)

• Action & Layout: Sydney fires back with pure action. Blessed with those world-class urban beaches, it absolutely decimates Melbourne in the nature department. It’s not even a contest. To compensate, Melburnians bike everywhere. We’d wake up in the morning and the streets looked like a bicycle superhighway of commuters heading to work. To get around, Melbourne uses these awesome, old-school trams, and riding them within the Central Business District is 100% free—a seriously cool perk. Sydney relies on standard, boring trains and buses. No points awarded there.

The Final Verdict

When all is said and done, Melbourne falls just a bit short of Sydney in my book. Sydney is modern, energized, and visually spectacular.

While Melbourne’s vintage look and relaxed atmosphere were cool to experience, at times it felt like we were trapped in a bit of a time warp. The city just appeared much older and slightly out of date. Now, don’t get me wrong, Melbourne isn’t some sleepy town like Mayberry, but it definitely feels like a throwback city when you place it side-by-side with the sheer energy of Sydney.

So, if you’re forced to pull the trigger and can only visit one city in Australia? Send it in on Sydney.

Melbourne Street Art

Darling Harbour

The Official Big Doug Loose Stools Index

🚽 Loose Stools Index: 9/10 (Living on Borrowed Time)

The gut is currently operating at near-peak performance.  A steady diet of solid Aussie pub food, meat pies, and clean drinking water has kept the index at a beautiful 9.  We are enjoying the stability while it lasts, because the flight to Asia is booked, and my stomach is about to enter the danger zone.

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